Sunday, October 18, 2009

THE FRAANDSHEEPER

There are a lot of them out there – the cult that my friends and I call “THE FRAANDSHEEPERS”- the jobless morons who have nothing better to do than hunt for IDs of female species of humankind and drop in the offline. And it is just to avoid these pea-brained, minimal grey-celled jerks I stay invisible while online. This was one of those rare occasions when I was in visible mode while online and a bugger who had been sending me offlines had been online too..(very very unfortunate for him as I was in one of my “ambush –the-bugger” moods.)


Bugger: hi
I: n who would u be?
Bugger: what do u mean
I : which word of "who would u be?" dint u understand dude??
Bugger: i dnt get uuuu....srry
I: thats very obvious now' **sort of STUPID
Bugger: hmmm k ..what else what ru doing.........
I: what would u do with that piece of information??
B: i will be satisfied myself
I: ** WHAT?? as in?
B: say me yar what happen to u ........
I: eh?????
B: hey iam getting mad …. gooo
I: u dont get mad.. u "go " mad **not very good English
B: i think u wont hav mood to chat ok fine
I: yeah u should have realised that before .. ** “wont have mood??” Bad English.. !
B: ohhhh noooooooooooooooooooooooo
I: what?
B: hey say me u wont like to chat.............
I: i thought i made that very obvious to u **BLINK BLINK
I: sad u din realise that before n made a fool of yourself for so long
B: nooooo
I: what no??
B:
I: now whats with showing your teeth? ** awright hes a GRADE A+ dimwit
B: hey say me ur yahoo id
I: why??** DUMB he’s chatting on the YM 
B: plzzz once requesting
B: plzzzz
I: what would u do with that though?/
B: hey plzzzz plzzzzzzzzzzzz
I: unless u give me a valid reason i wouldn’t
B: belive me plzzzz
I: believe u?? ** WHAT?? is this a movie dialogue.. ?? :O
B: do u have orkut id .................
I: n why would u wany that?
B: heyyyyyy diss toooooooo much
I: what is too much? **YEAH , u r getting on my nerves now
B: heyyyyy plzzzzz dont make me irritate
I: then why dont u just buzz off??** are u some food im cooking?that sounds like the food saying “hey don’t make me salty “
B: no i want to know who ru..........hey give me ur id i will send u mail
I: NO,thank u
B: hey who ru ,............OH! The main bugger was his brother .Family of buggers,,
B: just i want to know
B: nu na bro ki frnd aaa or else any other aaaa ane * translation: r u my brothers friend or someone else..
I: so spying on your brother eh??
B: hahahah
B: i got his password ...then i got u .... so say me who ru ...
I: n if i dont? ** WHAT?? Am I some kind of trophy?? Really irritated
B: hey say me whoo ruuuu
B: mad aaa neku * roughly translated : r u mad??
I: whats that ??
B: yaaaa u correct if u wont say i will loose sis
I: u will what?? ** A SIS?? :O :O Not happening ! Not happening
B: hey say me who ru ................?
I: awright say, i told u who i am.. what would u do with that lil piece of info ??
B: i do blackmail ..hahah
I: u said u r a 8th std kid dincha?
B: ya ..so what
I: so u r somthing like 13 years now? **and a total jackass
Bugger: no iam 14 now
I: oh then jus take a piece of advice frm me. u r an underage kid
Bugger: so
I: n all the underage kids are to be supervised while they r using the internet
Bugger: ya we use …iam from dehi public school u know …what ru talking
I: whom are u kidding? im talking english dude * PS: DPS is one of the most reputed schools in the country
im talking english dude
Bugger: i know that
I: i doubt it
Bugger: leave that all mam say what u do
I: i dont reveal my personal details to every layman i come across ** and certainly not to a cowdung -filled-brain like u.
Bugger: where u stay
I: do u know what "personal details " are??
Bugger: i knowww
I: i doubt u r frm DPS ** and i doubt if u got greycells
Bugger: hahhaah
Bugger: i know that but say me any thing about u
I: why do i have to? ** u wouldn’t understand anyway.
Bugger: u should bcoz i wasted my time with u
I: i never asked u to ** bha! As if I asked for this and he spent millions
Bugger: iam asking u kadhaaa
I: i have no obligation towards u
Bugger: iam getting sleep
I: so go n sleep
Bugger: i wont get sleep
I: n its pretty late for an 8th grader to be up at this time **decide if u r sleepy or not first
Bugger: noo
I: do u realise that your hacking of ur brothers id n using it for no useful purpose, without anybody watching over u can be cited as a cyber crime?
Bugger: abhaaaa
Bugger: hey ur madddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd…byeeee
I: scared eh?? **MISSION SUCCESSFUL.. 1 bugger down
Bugger: Heyyy... how u doin?
I: **what?? Again !!!
Bugger: Hey I just realized...you look a lot like my next girlfriend
I: this is absolutely lame ** what?? GOD FORBID that for ur own good
Bugger: hahahah
I: whats so funny?
Bugger: : < loads of smileys and audibles>
I: very lame …n an unimpressive way of attracting audience
Bugger: talk perfect english and understanding ok na … hey u mistaken i never try to impress to attract audience
I: then u wouldnt be so persistent
Bugger: i came to know that u dnt know english
I: wow!! sad for u ** oh?? Is it? Rolling eyes
Bugger: ya then that will be use to my brooo …but i cant understand what ru saying u
…go its late byeeee …cu tc
I: i seem to be talkin the proper english i suppose thats what u mean
Bugger: hv aaa nice sleep… gooooo
I: go??....whereto?
Bugger: what ru doing at this time ?
I: none of your business
B: i dnt hv any business …. hahaha
I: sad..shows your understanding of english
Bugger: ok byeeee u know my brooo aaa
I: dont forget to work on your english
B: how to do
I: u r frm dps arent u? u must be smart enough to work that out then
Bugger: fom where how should i do
I: figure out dude.u dont pay fees for nothing ** :O :O
Bugger: ya ..say me ..how should i do that
I: forget it
Bugger: what to 4get
I: u r hopeless case i have come across
Bugger: hahahah
I: n the most foolish
Bugger: plzzz help
I: buzz off
Bugger: hey u scolding me aaa
I: i have better manners than u do ** Actually, I would love to slap u
Bugger: hey say me akka plzzz…how to work out my English
I: buzz off kid! *PS: akka means elder sis ..
Bugger: byeeee i think i never chat with u again bcoz my bro will chage password
I: ** DANG!! There goes my stress buster.. :P

16 comments:

санжог said...

its that Firanship, Loveship, all problems solve ship...

How did you have that long conversation with an 8th grader?

But i got to give it to that guy....very persistent...even with poor English.

rahulamigo said...

how do ya even type for so long??!!!

but,yea...was funny...

susie said...

err i just copy pasted it,, :P


thanx for the read sanju, rahul

phoenix said...

an 8th grader........damn sue....maarke bhaga deti..

funny though......keep writing Sue

Sammok said...

er, very interesting. i read a quarter of that post and got pissed. :D

Peregrine said...

Rotfl :D

If u were a psychiatry student, this cud've been a good study into the idiocy of the human mind

susie said...

err sam.. i agree its a pretty long post... thanx for the read.. er whatever u have read

gee sharky.. what do u think if i sell this to a psychiatry student?? for a case study :P

thanx for the read.. :D

Sorcerer said...

haha..lol!! dat was ze funny aha!!

Saurabh Panshikar said...

haha
hilarious!

I guess you had way too much time and nothing else to do that day!

And I've known DPS only for that MMS scandal thing... And that was when you introduced the unsupervised internet part.....
So I began thinking on different term! lol

Anyways this was a good read.... Going on the next one.

miladawley said...

天主在你身邊..................................................

tristarfivestar said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
tristarfivestar said...

hahahahahahah.. what a stupid line "you look like my next gf".. LOL
hahaha
once someone leaked my email ID on some weird chat room.. so when ever i logged on ,i spent most of my time asking people "do i know you???" OR deleting them from the friend list..
weird 8 th grader thou

Sorcerer said...

Happy New Year!!!

have a fantastic New year

susie said...

thanx for the read saurabh, sorcy, miladawley, tristarfivestar :)

have a wonderful year:)

@tristarfivestar i knw how annoying it is to have unknown ppl on your friend list

Pratik Gupta said...

too much....the bugger can be a movie character...i mean the way he bugged is you is a masterpiece....i guess accolades goes to both of you
Keep bugging....err.. writing :D

Pratik Gupta said...

Oh!! You cant beat the "you look a lot like my next girlfriend" :P