SIMPLY FICTION

       She lay on the bed waiting. He was late. She had called him up an hour ago. He was always late - always busy. He had come. She was too feverish to  hear him open the door and come up the old creaking stairs. He opened the bedroom door  and found her - frail figure, shivering as though she was kept in the freezer. They knew each other since they were little children. One look at her was all he needed. He rushed to her and held her hand. He could feel the pulse. Like an experienced doctor he said accusingly, " U got drenched in the rain yesterday. Dint U?  U have flu."

PS: thanks sorcy for bugging, nagging and  threatening  me to write...:)

In the Lab

In the electrical technology lab:

External: what is the speed of the Transformer?

GeniASS(confidently): 1200-1500 sir. It varies.

External : how do u measure speed?

GeniASS: using the Tachometer, sir.

External : Take this tachometer and find me the speed of the transformer used in this lab **hands him the tachometer.

GeniASS walks to the table on which the transformer is placed and where a girl is performing her experiment..

GeniASS: excuse me, can u just give me a moment with the transformer.. i need to find its speed.

girl gives him a hard stare.

GeniASS: could u just tell me how do i find the speed of the transformer?

Girl: Idiot, its a static device. transformer doesnt have speed. :|

____________________++++________________________

In the electronics devices lab external:

WiseGuy shortcircuits the 2 ends of battery on the breadboard. Theres a KA-BOOM and a powercut.

Lab technician(accusingly): What have u done?? u short circuited it?? u can get out and give the finals next sem as supplimentary..

WiseGuy(with his hands burnt): NO sir i din do anything...Just wait till the power comes, u can see the output.

Lab technician: Out of the Lab now!!

WiseGuy: Sir, Please

The power returns and miraculously there's output on the CRO.

Lab Technician: H-how did u manage it??

Wiseguy: i connected the right circuit sir..

___________________+++++++++++_____________________

In the Fluid Mechanics Lab:

the problem in this lab was that the indicating metres were at a height and all the shorties(me included) had difficulty noting down the readings and there was only one chair.

On the first Day of the Lab:

Lab Incharge: take the accurate readings. look into the meter perpendicularly to avoid the parallax error.

Shortie: Errm sir, i wouldnt be able to do that. Im a little short. Do u think i could borrow your chair while i need to take the readings??

Lab Incharge(mocking): Yeah sure, why not?

Shortie: Sir, could i do the same during the externals?? Wouldnt the external mind if i take away his chair??

__________________++++++++++++____________________

THE FRAANDSHEEPER

There are a lot of them out there – the cult that my friends and I call “THE FRAANDSHEEPERS”- the jobless morons who have nothing better to do than hunt for IDs of female species of humankind and drop in the offline. And it is just to avoid these pea-brained, minimal grey-celled jerks I stay invisible while online. This was one of those rare occasions when I was in visible mode while online and a bugger who had been sending me offlines had been online too..(very very unfortunate for him as I was in one of my “ambush –the-bugger” moods.)


Bugger: hi
I: n who would u be?
Bugger: what do u mean
I : which word of "who would u be?" dint u understand dude??
Bugger: i dnt get uuuu....srry
I: thats very obvious now' **sort of STUPID
Bugger: hmmm k ..what else what ru doing.........
I: what would u do with that piece of information??
B: i will be satisfied myself
I: ** WHAT?? as in?
B: say me yar what happen to u ........
I: eh?????
B: hey iam getting mad …. gooo
I: u dont get mad.. u "go " mad **not very good English
B: i think u wont hav mood to chat ok fine
I: yeah u should have realised that before .. ** “wont have mood??” Bad English.. !
B: ohhhh noooooooooooooooooooooooo
I: what?
B: hey say me u wont like to chat.............
I: i thought i made that very obvious to u **BLINK BLINK
I: sad u din realise that before n made a fool of yourself for so long
B: nooooo
I: what no??
B:
I: now whats with showing your teeth? ** awright hes a GRADE A+ dimwit
B: hey say me ur yahoo id
I: why??** DUMB he’s chatting on the YM 
B: plzzz once requesting
B: plzzzz
I: what would u do with that though?/
B: hey plzzzz plzzzzzzzzzzzz
I: unless u give me a valid reason i wouldn’t
B: belive me plzzzz
I: believe u?? ** WHAT?? is this a movie dialogue.. ?? :O
B: do u have orkut id .................
I: n why would u wany that?
B: heyyyyyy diss toooooooo much
I: what is too much? **YEAH , u r getting on my nerves now
B: heyyyyy plzzzzz dont make me irritate
I: then why dont u just buzz off??** are u some food im cooking?that sounds like the food saying “hey don’t make me salty “
B: no i want to know who ru..........hey give me ur id i will send u mail
I: NO,thank u
B: hey who ru ,............OH! The main bugger was his brother .Family of buggers,,
B: just i want to know
B: nu na bro ki frnd aaa or else any other aaaa ane * translation: r u my brothers friend or someone else..
I: so spying on your brother eh??
B: hahahah
B: i got his password ...then i got u .... so say me who ru ...
I: n if i dont? ** WHAT?? Am I some kind of trophy?? Really irritated
B: hey say me whoo ruuuu
B: mad aaa neku * roughly translated : r u mad??
I: whats that ??
B: yaaaa u correct if u wont say i will loose sis
I: u will what?? ** A SIS?? :O :O Not happening ! Not happening
B: hey say me who ru ................?
I: awright say, i told u who i am.. what would u do with that lil piece of info ??
B: i do blackmail ..hahah
I: u said u r a 8th std kid dincha?
B: ya ..so what
I: so u r somthing like 13 years now? **and a total jackass
Bugger: no iam 14 now
I: oh then jus take a piece of advice frm me. u r an underage kid
Bugger: so
I: n all the underage kids are to be supervised while they r using the internet
Bugger: ya we use …iam from dehi public school u know …what ru talking
I: whom are u kidding? im talking english dude * PS: DPS is one of the most reputed schools in the country
im talking english dude
Bugger: i know that
I: i doubt it
Bugger: leave that all mam say what u do
I: i dont reveal my personal details to every layman i come across ** and certainly not to a cowdung -filled-brain like u.
Bugger: where u stay
I: do u know what "personal details " are??
Bugger: i knowww
I: i doubt u r frm DPS ** and i doubt if u got greycells
Bugger: hahhaah
Bugger: i know that but say me any thing about u
I: why do i have to? ** u wouldn’t understand anyway.
Bugger: u should bcoz i wasted my time with u
I: i never asked u to ** bha! As if I asked for this and he spent millions
Bugger: iam asking u kadhaaa
I: i have no obligation towards u
Bugger: iam getting sleep
I: so go n sleep
Bugger: i wont get sleep
I: n its pretty late for an 8th grader to be up at this time **decide if u r sleepy or not first
Bugger: noo
I: do u realise that your hacking of ur brothers id n using it for no useful purpose, without anybody watching over u can be cited as a cyber crime?
Bugger: abhaaaa
Bugger: hey ur madddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd…byeeee
I: scared eh?? **MISSION SUCCESSFUL.. 1 bugger down
Bugger: Heyyy... how u doin?
I: **what?? Again !!!
Bugger: Hey I just realized...you look a lot like my next girlfriend
I: this is absolutely lame ** what?? GOD FORBID that for ur own good
Bugger: hahahah
I: whats so funny?
Bugger: : < loads of smileys and audibles>
I: very lame …n an unimpressive way of attracting audience
Bugger: talk perfect english and understanding ok na … hey u mistaken i never try to impress to attract audience
I: then u wouldnt be so persistent
Bugger: i came to know that u dnt know english
I: wow!! sad for u ** oh?? Is it? Rolling eyes
Bugger: ya then that will be use to my brooo …but i cant understand what ru saying u
…go its late byeeee …cu tc
I: i seem to be talkin the proper english i suppose thats what u mean
Bugger: hv aaa nice sleep… gooooo
I: go??....whereto?
Bugger: what ru doing at this time ?
I: none of your business
B: i dnt hv any business …. hahaha
I: sad..shows your understanding of english
Bugger: ok byeeee u know my brooo aaa
I: dont forget to work on your english
B: how to do
I: u r frm dps arent u? u must be smart enough to work that out then
Bugger: fom where how should i do
I: figure out dude.u dont pay fees for nothing ** :O :O
Bugger: ya ..say me ..how should i do that
I: forget it
Bugger: what to 4get
I: u r hopeless case i have come across
Bugger: hahahah
I: n the most foolish
Bugger: plzzz help
I: buzz off
Bugger: hey u scolding me aaa
I: i have better manners than u do ** Actually, I would love to slap u …
Bugger: hey say me akka plzzz…how to work out my English
I: buzz off kid! *PS: akka means elder sis ..
Bugger: byeeee i think i never chat with u again bcoz my bro will chage password
I: ** DANG!! There goes my stress buster.. :P